Are we in a gay sports bar?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
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