i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I would fuck him just for his dog
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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