I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
