Kiss
Puke
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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