don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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