Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize