That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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