I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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