their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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