THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize