He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
