I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
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I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
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Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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