Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
