weddingsv make me drug and hornr
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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