Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
