yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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