I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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