dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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