i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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