even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Just high enough for therapy.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
