She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
