Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
