Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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