i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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