3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
