I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
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We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
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I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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