My liver just broke up with me...
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
