We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?