Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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