Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
