This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
