I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
