I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
