apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
