I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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