Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize