they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
