I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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