so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
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