maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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