drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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