so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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