Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I want to stick my p in your. b.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
