Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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