THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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