weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
My penis needs a shock collar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize