the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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