you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
