I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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