You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
